Friend or foe? My biggest rival

29 Dec

Talking to a friend about our rivals and those people we never seem to be able to beat no matter how many matches we play against them, he asked me who my greatest enemy was.

Inspired by this question, this post is about my nemesis.

This will also count as my answer to day 5 of this week’s writing challenge. Weekly Writing Challenge: Just Do It!.

I look at her, and the first thing I notice are her eyes. Today they are blue. In the past, probably around 12 years, I saw those eyes daily, and their colour was never the same two days in a row. Yesterday, they were green – she was so focused on surpassing me. Today, they are blue – she is now content to work and cooperate with me. This makes me glad, because I do not feel like fighting her anymore.

This girl, so alike me, has been my rival for many years now. Ever since I came to understand the notion of competing against and surpassing someone, she became the one who I most desired to be ahead of. If I didn’t, no matter how significant my successes, I pushed myself even harder to excel. She challenges me constantly and in every aspect of my life.

In class, if I am not paying attention, she is likely to answer before me. Whether the teacher praises her or not, and whether her idea was worth mentioning or just a mere observation, I always feel that I have missed a point and should have been more focused.

On the tennis court, despite the fact that she is not the one across the net it most often feels like I am actually fighting her. She is always whispering into my ear, sometimes filling my mind with doubts. However, on those days that her eyes are blue and she offers me encouragements, I work harder to prove to her that I am present and determined, and that she cannot steal my spotlight.

With my friends, who are her friends as well, she is usually shy. This gives me the edge, and I always try to be creative and spontaneous to keep my friends from noticing her quiet self. This has made me the one with initiative in our group, and I pride myself that at least in this respect, I am almost always ahead of her, unless she suddenly feels happy and excited about something, a moment when she is so exuberant that it is impossible not to listen and be energized by her.

She is my best friend and my biggest nemesis. Despite the fact that I am always evolving, she is never far behind, but I have learned to value our relationship. She is my inner self, a girl always on the run for the shadow of what she can become. I, Laura, am the one I have to surpass; I am the one against whom I compete. I could easily compare myself to opponents, classmates, and friends, but they are not always on the same course as me. I, on the other hand, am an always-present reminder of my achievements and goals, and a constant incentive not to let them out of sight or to become complacent.

girl and her shadow

girl and her shadow

Hence, despite not being an actual enemy, I truly believe that I am the only one who can slow me down or keep me from rising up to my potential. When I think of having to face someone else, the first thing that always comes to my mind are my own perceived faults, and how I can overcome them.

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